Show Printable Version Search This Thread Advanced Search   Allstars Forum Register  |  Login  |  Search  |  Chat Allstars Forum > Message Board > Funnies   Username: Password:   Remember Me? Thread Tools  | Search This Thread  Reply   Author Comment   View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts Brian28 Registered: 07/09/06 Posts: 723      05/01/07 at 06:46 PM Reply with quote #46 Ian, I have no hair, Oh apart from a few silver chest and pube hairs and the odd one on my arrrse. Other than those that have been bitten off of course. Brian. View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts STiDavid Registered: 08/05/06 Posts: 356      05/01/07 at 08:16 PM Reply with quote #47 Just found this,own up if you have done one or more of these,, Being British Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV. And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign! Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. Only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke. Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters. Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage. Only in Britain do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. Only in Britain are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink. NOT TO MENTION.. 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue. 142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts. 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in. 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate. British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents. 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth. A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth. 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars. and finally... In 2000 eight Brits were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet. __________________ View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts ianuk Registered: 01/04/07 Posts: 340      05/12/07 at 05:32 PM Reply with quote #48 Hello all, some more for you, __________________ Ian 2009 View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts Fletch Registered: 06/06/06 Posts: 860      06/08/07 at 11:33 AM Reply with quote #49 Everyone      This is a test to see how many of you are real gentlemen and to see if you can keep your EYES  on the snake and not the fact that this young lady has worn a short dress and gone COMMANDO  Admit it you all had a look .............didn't you!!!!!! Fletch          P.S Do you class that as a Brazilian or a Hollywood?????????? __________________ View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts Dave7 Registered: 06/09/06 Posts: 162      06/08/07 at 12:31 PM Reply with quote #50 Fletch, what on earth were you looking for when you came across these pictures? View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts Fletch Registered: 06/06/06 Posts: 860      06/08/07 at 01:16 PM Reply with quote #51 Dave7      I was looking for the best way to do squats without hurting your back.......apparently you have to do a full squat as the young lady is demonstrating for maximum effect!!!!!!! Fletch __________________ View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts Dave7 Registered: 06/09/06 Posts: 162      06/08/07 at 02:27 PM Reply with quote #52 Sure you were! View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts Brian28 Registered: 07/09/06 Posts: 723      06/08/07 at 03:10 PM Reply with quote #53 Carl, That camera man was lucky two wild creatures in one shot. Dp you think he was using his own tripod???? Think about it. But I agree with Dave7 "sure you were" Brian.  View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts ianuk Registered: 01/04/07 Posts: 340      06/08/07 at 06:09 PM Reply with quote #54 Staying home, bored, so more pics for you all __________________ Ian 2009 View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts neo Registered: 02/27/07 Posts: 53      06/08/07 at 08:58 PM Reply with quote #55 re the 'girl and the snake' it looks like a squashed pairs of balls and 'shehe?' is holding up the pen-is. mind you i dont know what a lady would look like in that position.......beautiful snake though... lizzie   __________________ lizzie View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts STiDavid Registered: 08/05/06 Posts: 356      06/08/07 at 09:01 PM Reply with quote #56 Quote: Originally Posted by neo re the 'girl and the snake' it looks like a squashed pairs of balls and 'shehe?' is holding up the pen-is. mind you i dont know what a lady would look like in that position.......beautiful snake though... lizzie   Re  the snake that is sooooooooooooooooooooo beatiful,what a nice photo  .................................. __________________ View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts neo Registered: 02/27/07 Posts: 53      06/08/07 at 09:06 PM Reply with quote #57 i've got to be honest here......the lad scared me a little. how on earth do you lads handle one of them coming at you.....i know it would scare the hell out of me.........lol........lizzie. __________________ lizzie View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts hank Registered: 01/02/07 Posts: 1,212      06/09/07 at 04:38 PM Reply with quote #58 What would scare me Little Liz is being that woman , wearing no knickers and being next to a snake that big who,s looking for a warm  hole to hide in.   ooooooouch. HANK  View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts ianuk Registered: 01/04/07 Posts: 340      06/09/07 at 05:03 PM Reply with quote #59 DAVEL, Sir, can you please e-mail the joke about the polish man and his wife from cork. I have a few polish staff working for me. Cheers, Ian __________________ Ian 2009 View Member ProfileSend Private MessageSend EmailFind Member's Threads Find Member's Posts neo Registered: 02/27/07 Posts: 53      06/10/07 at 08:00 AM Reply with quote #60 hole you say.. it looked like a mammoth cave .........still very scary   __________________ lizzie Previous Thread | Next Thread Page 4 of 17    < 1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |  6  |  7 >  » Last Reply   Bookmarks    Digg  del.icio.us  StumbleUpon  Google